Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Worst. Toys. Ever. #6

Another day of me shamelessly stealing from another website for a list of the 12 worst toys ever. I'll post them over the next 5 days (or when I get around to it). Some of them are pretty darn funny, all of them have major flaws (some fatal flaws). At the end of the list, I will attribute the source of my plagiarism.

6. Snacktime Cabbage Patch Dolls

"Feed Me!" begged the packaging for 1996's Cabbage Patch Snacktime Kid. And much like the carnivorous Audrey II from Little Shop of Horrors, the adorable lineup of Cabbage Patch snack-dolls appeared at first to be harmless. They merely wanted a nibble—a carrot perhaps, or maybe some yummy pudding. They would stop chewing when snack time was done—they promised. Then they chomped your child's finger off.

In creating this innovative new toy, the great minds at Mattel devised a motorized mouth that sensed neither pleasure nor pain. It chewed for chewing's sake. With no mechanism to turn off the munching should trouble arise, it was only a matter of time before some cherub's long blond hair got caught in the doll's rabid jaws. After 35 fingers and ponytails fell victim, the Snacktime Kids were removed from retail shelves forever, and 500,000 customers were offered a full $40 refund.

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